It’s funny the things we do to cope.  14 years ago in September, I was at Walt Disney World with my honey, Steve, on our honeymoon.  One night, on the way out of the park, we went into one of the large shops in one of the parks.  I always liked to look at the clothing and nightwear )and everything else!)  Steve was someplace – lost him.  Anyway,  as I was wandering around, here he comes with a LARGE Disney bag.  I wondered what on earth he bought, because he was generally a window-shopper.

So he opens the bag and pulls out — Winnie-the-Pooh and Tigger.  18 inches each worth of Pooh and Tigger!

For 13 years, these two buddies either sat on our bed or on the chest at the foot of the bed.  Last fall one morning, they got tossed over against the wall, on the cedar chest, with other unsorted junk.

Finally, today, they came home.

Pooh and Tigger come home.jpg


The Incredible Newness of Being…Not-Us

I’m starting to understand why the Victorians and Edwardians set aside a year of mourning. It seems an arbitrary time frame, but in retrospect it’s not. It takes time to adjust, to change, to redefine. It takes time to create new patterns, habits, and plans. After a year, you start feeling kind of normal. Oh, not the way you used to feel normal, but normal for this newness of being.

In some ways it stinks. Well, in most ways it stinks. Old ‘us’ plans and dreams give way to new ‘just me’ plans. Dreams are still in the future, though. Planning is hard enough. It’s been 1 year and 23 days now – and that alone shows the newness. I’m not someone who remembers numbers. I always had to ask Steve what date my dad died! (Now I have to go look it up.) But I know what date, about what time, and even what day of the week Steve died. Ugh.

I’m getting better. I can focus on a book or project for more than 10 minutes at a time now.  I’m getting involved with new, not-us activities, like line dancing classes and teaching youth Sunday school. But it’s still difficult on an everyday level. I can’t just turn to someone in the morning and say ‘Let’s drive down to the shore, (or the mall, or wherever,)’ anymore. Now I have to decide to either go by myself or plan ahead with someone.  That, too, is the newness of not-us.

God has been faithful.  He has brought friends alongside to take care of what I couldn’t, and some things i still can’t.  He has given me people who call and say “Let’s go out.”  He has given me Himself, most importantly, and put up with me when I can’t seem to focus on His word.  But He is ever there with His peace.

So thank you to everyone who has stepped in and stepped up.  Thank you for caring, for loving, for just being there, And thank you, dearest Lord, for Your ever-present comfort.



Two things I ask of you; deny them not to me before I die:Remove far from me falsehood and lying; give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with the food that is needful for me,lest I be full and deny you and say, “Who is the Lord?” or lest I be poor and steal and profane the name of my God. PROVERBS 30:7-9

An idea worth considering: enough resources to live on but not so little as to be in want, nor so much as too become proud or arrogant.